#NotAllMen Controversy
- It's On Us
- Apr 18, 2021
- 3 min read
TW: Mention of sexual assault
Welcome back to the blog! Today’s entry is about #NotAllMen and just how toxic it is towards sexual assault survivors and the narrative of these experiences. This hashtag started circulating after talk of the 97% movement going around. If you are unaware of this movement, it is based off of a study done in the United Kingdom where women ages 18-24 were interviewed about whether or not they had experienced sexual assault. In the results, 97 percent of these women did indeed experience sexual assault at one point in their life. Men from around the world have responded to this statistic, and not all of them supportive.
#NotAllMen began as a way for some men to say “I haven’t done anything wrong and I shouldn’t be blamed for it, don’t count me in that statistic.” This divergence from the real issue is almost a coverup for other men’s actions and not taking accountability for what they can do better in society. We know not every single man has sexually assaulted somebody else, but it’s important to try to stay as safe as possible.
Generalizations are used all the time for safety reasons. If we were told that a pack of food had one poisoned piece, we would most likely avoid it to be safe, right? The likelihood of being poisoned is low, but we still avoid the pack just in case. The same thing goes for teaching women to be safe. Women don’t walk home alone at night and they carry around pepper spray just in case something were to happen. Emphasis on the just in case; it might not happen, but there’s always a chance. So, why can we say #NotAllMen?
The #MeToo movement was incredible in raising awareness about the realities of sexual assault and allowed survivors to encourage others to tell their stories. Sharing your story is not easy and many survivors receive backlash for various reasons. This movement began some progress in changing the stigma of sexual assault and what “type” of person can be assaulted. Now, having the #NotAllMen “movement” is taking two steps back.
Shifting this narrative from reflecting on what needs to change in the male gender to trying not to be blamed leads to a downplay in the reality and importance of validating survivor experiences. As Madeline Papcun says, the people who are supporting the #NotAllMen are treating this defense of survivors as a “witch-hunt,” which discredits the real experiences of those same survivors. The focus should be listening to and supporting survivors, not to figure out which men are not perpetrators.
It’s past the time that men should be held accountable for their actions and the “boys will be boys” cannot be taught anymore. With Gen Z and Millenials, change is ever growing and we are not accepting anything less than what we deserve. I am hopeful that this new wave of sharing experiences and breaking stigmas is here to stay and real change can happen. Once accountability is established, stories can be told without fear of rejection.
If you or someone you know is a survivor of sexual assault, please visit our "Crisis Support" tab that has resources for reporting and getting the help you need. If you are a student at Clemson University, you can reach out to any of our leadership for support. RAINN has a survivor hotline, survivor stories, and extended resources to assist you in getting the help you need. Please visit https://www.rainn.org for more information.
See you guys soon! It’s On Us
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